Since its start, well over 3 months ago, The James Szabo Clinic for incurable retardedness as cured over 400 people suffering from the disease.

Using a mixture of natural remedies and electro shock therapy, we cure the patients of all types of retardedness.

The Clinic, headed by DR. James Szabo (he himself a sufferer), is a revolutionary place, so revolutionary that the world medical boards deemed it immoral.

Due to practises out in place by the Geneva Convention, it is now immoral and inhumane to attach electric leads to patients testicles and to force feed massive doses of Rohypnol........ So with that being the case the world medical boards tried to stop our treatments from going ahead....But we were doing it for the greater good...Thats why we had to go underground

In order to best describe our mission, here is a case example...

Mr Schuit was brought to us suffering severe Violent Retardedness....

This meant that when Mr Scuit couldnt communicate properly, he would start to become very violent. Something that happened quite frequently..

However, the normal treatment wouldn’t be enough, due to his severe disease, and also, his weight...

To ensure the best possible treatment, numerous experiments were tested on substitute ricks. Finally we found a bear that was suitable as a test study, and we could begin to shape our treatment...

Arguably, the bear was smaller than Mr Schuit, but certain liberties had to be taken...

Thankfully, a treatment plan was set in place. 14 whacks to the head, electro shock therapy and a complete body shave to get rid of the excess hair...


After 4 weeks, Mr Schuit came out a different person.

His good friend Matthew had this to say
"Ricko was a different...well....human, i'd guess you call him now.... He was still a miserable c**t, but less retarded. Thanks DR Szabo!!"

No, thankyou....Without Severe cases like Mr Schuit, The Clinic would not be able find new ways of treating "special" patients..

For More information on the clinic, Visit the James Szabo Clinic for Incurable Retardedness.

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